A Pirate's Life for Me

"I have to say, Lucas, this has never happened before and again, I'm sorry you've been brought all this way out here because of a mistake."

Lucas paced the kitchen with Kip's cell phone pressed to his ear. Kip sat cross-legged on the counter, shamelessly eavesdropping. First he and then Mr. Aras, the entertainment director for the Arcadia Hotel, explained the bad news to Lucas: there were *two* pirate shows -- one featuring men and women performing for a heterosexual crowd, the other featuring a crew of all men who performed for a gay crowd. Apparently, much to Lucas' dismay, Anteros Island pandered heavily to gay men.

"So there really isn't any opening in the regular show?" Lucas asked, biting his thumbnail. "Nothing in the near future? Someone finishing up their contract, maybe?"

He listened to Mr. Aras do a few mouse clicks. "The next expiring contract on that show comes up in four months, and there's a good chance that crew member will renew. This is his third extension."

"Damn."

Lucas was stressed. He couldn't go back to Chicago now. Not after he'd seen what a dream job this was. When would he ever get another opportunity to work on a tropical island as a pirate? Sure, he could be added to the waitlist for a spot on the heterosexual show, but what would he do in Chicago in the meantime now that his contract with the Tall Ships had expired? Work fast food? Sell clothes? He didn't have any other skills.

He stabbed a hand through his hair while he thought furiously. At the counter, Kip gave him an encouraging smile. Lucas smiled back weakly. Kip was a nice guy. Gay or not, Lucas could imagine them becoming friends. Lucas stared at him for a long moment and then made up his mind.

"Mr. Aras, what if I stuck with this show until an opening came up on the other crew?"

"But, Lucas, you said you aren't gay."

"I'm not, but how much gay content is there on this show? Couldn't I play one of the supporting roles? Like a crewman who hangs around in the rigging or something? You don't need to be gay to swing from the ropes, do you?"

Kip smacked himself in the forehead again while Mr. Aras paused in answering.

"The crew of the show is gay and the audience is gay, Lucas. I can't help thinking it would be dishonest or disrespectful to have a straight man in the show." Aras sighed heavily. "Don't you think?"

"Not at all," Lucas jumped in, seeing a chance to sway the older man. "We're putting on a performance. They want to see attractive men dashing about being pirates. I can fulfill that fantasy. It's not like I'll be expected to have sex with them or anything." He mentally shuddered at the thought. "They'll have no idea I'm straight and I promise I'll be nothing but respectful of my crew's preferences. It won't even be an issue. I'm an adult, Mr. Aras, and I think I'm a pretty decent one, at that. I respect other peoples' choices."

Kip cupped his hands around his mouth and whispered loudly, "Being gay isn't a choice, bro!"

Lucas waved him down, hoping Aras hadn't heard him. "I want to be here, Mr. Aras. I'll do everything I'm asked and I'll be an asset to the crew. Let me stick with the show until there's an opening on the other crew. Please, Mr. Aras."

Another drawn-out sigh. "Lucas, I really don't think --"

"I'll work for $300 a week," Lucas blurted. He immediately winced at the rash decision, but if losing out on $800 a month for a few months gave him a chance at full-time on the straight show, he'd take it. "You can't beat that bargain, Mr. Aras. You won't have to pay for my passage back and I'll work for peanuts until I can transfer to the other show. You know you can't turn that down. All the paperwork has been done. I'm already here. Use me."

He heard Aras's chair squeak as the man shifted. "I like your persistence, Lucas, and I appreciate your offer. But your contract has already been written. I can't change your salary."

"Then what about --"

"I'll consider it." Lucas shut his mouth and jammed the phone to his ear. "I'll consider it," Aras continued, "and if Adam gives me his personal okay, then you can remain here. But you have to meet with him and discuss this. It's his crew. If he feels comfortable with the situation, you stay. If he doesn't, I'm sorry, Lucas, but we'll have to make arrangements to return you to the mainland. Is that fair enough?"

Lucas shut his eyes and slumped back against the refrigerator. "More than fair, sir. Thank you. Thank you so much."

"Don't thank me yet," Mr. Aras warned with a chuckle. "You still have to convince Adam why you should stay. He'll be tougher than I."

Lucas tried to picture a tough gay guy and couldn't. Every gay man he'd ever known had been similar to Kip: short and/or skinny and usually very effeminate. In other words, easy for a jock type like him to charm. "I'll win him over. I'll show him that I can be a positive addition to the crew."

"Then I wish you luck, Lucas. You sound like a nice guy. It'd be a shame to have to send you back."

"Thank you, sir. Don't bother making plans. I'm staying."

He could hear the smile in Aras's voice. "I'll be looking forward to hearing from Adam, then. Take care."

Lucas closed the phone and handed it back to Kip, who was shaking his head. "What? You don't think I can convince him?"

Kip tucked the phone into his pocket. "No, I don't. And I know Tyler isn't going to go for this, either. Tyler's got a chip on his shoulder about straight guys. He thinks they're all repressed queers." Kip sighed, looking like a defeated puppy dog. "I think you're going back, bro. I wouldn't unpack if I were you." He sighed again and hopped off the counter. "This really sucks. I was looking forward to hooking up with you."

"Kip, I'm not leaving. I can't."

The other man shook his head, avoiding Lucas's eyes. "You're not staying, Lucas. But good luck trying, I suppose."

Lucas blinked as understanding dawned on him. He caught the other man by the arm as he moved to exit the kitchen. "I should have asked you if it was okay if I tried to stay," he said quietly. "I'm taking the spot of someone who'd be better suited as your roommate." Though he hated to say it, he needed to: "If you'd rather I leave, just say the word, Kip. I'll go without another word. It's not fair to you otherwise."

Surprise rounded Kip's features. "But I thought you needed this job?"

Lucas sighed, releasing his hold on Kip's arm. "I do, but I'm not going to bulldoze my way onto your crew. This is your home and your job. You're the one who's supposed to be here, not me. So it's your call, Kip. I won't hold it against you if you decide you'd rather have a gay roommate come in. Honestly I won't. If the tables were turned and I had a chance of a gorgeous girl in my room instead of you, you'd already be hitching a ride on a tuna boat." He grinned to show he was teasing.

Kip's green eyes deepened. He suddenly stepped forward until he was toe to toe with Lucas. "Would I? Even if I told you I'd let you fuck me?"

Lucas sucked in his breath at the bolt of tension that snapped between them. His face flamed.

Kip slowly smiled.

"Yeah, I want you to stay, bro. If you do, I might get that glimpse of your naked bod."

Lucas had to force his laughter. He couldn't believe he'd just imagined having sex with Kip. "If I make it onto the crew you can stare at my lily white butt all you want."

Kip made a face. "Tan lines? Bro, we gotta get rid of those!"

The tension was broken, and Lucas breathed a secret sigh of relief. "Help me convince Adam to let me stay and I'll let you take me to every nude beach on this island."

Kip's grin was pure sex. "You are so on." He checked out Lucas from head to toe. "They'll be coming home any minute now. Let's clean you up. The hotter you look, the less likely Adam'll be to send you home. It's important to him to have a good-looking crew, you know?"

Lucas nodded. He was relieved to have Kip on his side. He stood a better chance with Adam this way. "Let me take a quick shower. Look through my bag and pick out what I should wear."

"What, you think just because I'm gay I'm into fashion?" Kip snapped, planting his hands on his hips.

Lucas's stomach sank into his feet. "Oh, shit, no, I didn't mean --"

Kip's lips split into a grin. "Don't sweat it, bro. I was only teasing you. Go jump in the shower. I'll find some clothes for you."

"You asshole," Lucas grumbled before heading for the guest bathroom.

***

"You don't think my button-down would be better?" Lucas looked at himself in the mirror doubtfully. "I thought I was supposed to get dressed up."

"In this case you need to be dressed down," Kip replied as he lounged on his side on his bed, admiring Lucas while he stood in front of the mirrored closet doors wearing only a pair of tight brown shorts. "You've got a hot bod, bro. No one can resist a blonde swimmer. Hopefully not even Adam."

Lucas ran a hand through his hair, sighing inwardly. He'd stopped Kip from rubbing oil onto his chest and shoulders but he still felt like a piece of meat on display. Still, if it got him the job, it would be worth it. And what was the point of all his workouts and healthy eating if it wasn't to show off his body?

He turned from the mirror so he wouldn't have to see Kip staring at him in it. "So tell me about Adam. What do I need to know about him?"

Kip dropped his eyes and picked at the comforter on his bed. "Don't resist him, bro. That's the best advice I can give you. He's the captain. Do what he says. Even when we're not working."

Oh, great. A guy who takes the alpha male thing to the extreme. Lucas had had to deal with his fair share of them on the ship. Fortunately he was easy-going for the most part. It was only when someone was incompetent that he had a problem submitting to their orders.

"Okay, I can do that. Anything else?"

Kip raised his eyes. The worry on his face touched Lucas a little. The other man was really trying to help him. "Try to get on Tyler's good side as soon as possible. He's the key. He and Adam are together, you see, so if Tyler hates you, he'll convince Adam to hate you, too."

"Together as in . . ."

"They're fucking each other, bro." Kip grinned.

Lucas breathed deeply. "Okay. So treat Tyler like the bitchy girlfriend. Got it."

Kip groaned. "This is going to go down bad, I can already tell."

"Hey, don't give up on me already! Come on, roomie, you're my ace in the hole!"

It made Kip laugh. "Okay, okay, bro. I won't run up the white flag just yet. You're hotter than most of the crewmembers and Adam might get off on you being straight, who knows. I'll keep my fingers crossed." He abruptly sat up as they heard the sound of motorcycles pulling up to the front of the cottage. "They're here, bro. Pinch your nipples! Bite your lips! Make 'em all puffy!"

Lucas stared at him as if he were nuts. "What the hell, Kip, I'm not meeting them looking like I just had sex with you!"

"Oh, damn, this is so not going to work," Kip muttered as he jumped off the bed and grabbed Lucas by the wrist to drag him out into the living room.

The other man's nervous reaction contributed to Lucas's. He forced himself to breathe deeply. He told himself this was just another job interview. Impress Adam for the next half hour and for the next year he'd have the best job of his life. No problem. He could do it. He would do it.

Then the door opened, and the man who stepped through it made Lucas realize he'd underestimated this situation entirely. As his eyes widened, beside him Kip cleared his throat and said, "Hey, Cap'n, guess who just landed on the island? Our new whipping boy!"